K. asks me frequently if I can “tell” if I’m pregnant yet. She leans in to kiss “the baby” and I say “Please don’t say that!” I, myself, thought that I should be in touch with my body enough to just “tell.” I am actually surprised that I can’t tell. Nope, I have no idea. My only symptoms are very mild unusual “cramping” in the general area which either signifies good things going on in there or is just gas.
The truth is, I really shouldn’t feel anything by now because it takes as much at 6-8 days after insemination for the egg to actually implant and I’m on day 5. It’s a long slow ride down the tiny fallopian tubes, it seems. I find myself wondering what the the egg does in all of that time.
In other news, I was okayed to go back on antihistimines today which made the day 50 percent better, since, as I’d mentioned they don’t really work that well. We went to a zootunes concert of Emmylou Harris, Patty Griffin, Shawn Colvin and Buddy miller and I didn’t die of sneezing. This is totally random, but Shawn Colvin does nothing for me. Her voice is beautiful but I have never identified with a single song. Today before the show I taught myself a very hard Patty Griffin song I thought I’d never learn because it was too intense on my fingers. I just got tired of saying “I can’t” about it for the last five years and today I knew I could if I tried.
Saw some cute little boys at the zoo. I might be alright if we ever had a boy- as long as he has curly hair.